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Text Flirting…or is that txt flrtng?
Text Flirting…or is that txt flrtng?

By Dana Gornitzki

As if wooing a potential flame wasn’t difficult enough, technology promises to add another layer of confusion. A suitor hiding behind the liquid crystal veil of the mobile screen could be interpreted as a laissez-faire, even facile, approach to courtship.

If one must resort to sending a text, or sms, then do it with grace. (Although, if the truth be known, we don’t encourage this form of courting - call us old-fashioned.)

Here are a few thoughts to consider before you press ‘send’:

- Type your message in its entirety, avoiding the use of txt tlk - it’s not elegant and makes your message look rushed.

- Be cool, calm and in control. Minimise your use of the exclamation mark.  You wouldn’t want to appear overly chipper now, would you?!?!?!!

- The same goes for emoticons. Why use winks ;) and happy faces :) when the right words will do the job?  It’s not gallant or cute. If you must include emoticons, stick to just the one. Yes, really.  (continued below)

Not an uncommon reaction to inappropriate "text-courting"

Not an uncommon reaction to inappropriate text flirtation

- How about abbreviations such as “lol” (laugh out loud). Not at all funny or winsome, at least we don’t think so. Spell out the full word, it is not terribly labourious and looks appreciably better. Absolutely.

- Never text anything that you wouldn’t say to someone’s face. For example, any discussion of your bits is ill-advised. Believe it or not, there are people who actually dare to do this – we have documentary proof. Most vulgar.

- It’s one thing to send a flirtatious sweet nothing but, remember, once you have pressed ‘send’, there’s no going back. So, think about your words and beware of sending anything too saucy or emotive.

Living with regret is not pretty.

- Last but not least (and we feel it’s important to note), stay away from sending a text message after too many libations or if it’s late, for that matter. Patience is your friend when it comes to romance, and it is always a good idea to wait until you are sober.

Courtship and the mobile phone are not the most ideal bedfellows, but all too common in the modern age. Keep it light, make it fun, and don’t be afraid to actually pick up the phone and dial. The object of affection will be pleased as punch.

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We’d like you to tell us if you have ever sent a horrific flirt by text? Or, have you received an unfortunate text that you would like to share or get feedback on? Please comment below or - better yet - start a dialogue in our Salon. We’re yearning to hear.

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Comments

First: Hi, Dana! I loved this article. Your site is amazing. Here is my contribution, in the form of a much-regretted text message I once sent: My boss had asked me to meet her for a drink to discuss the day’s events. My live-in boyfriend at the time - I’ll call him….Burl…was just getting home for the evening, and I had started cooking dinner & settling in for the night. I hastily replied - not checking what my predictive text had assumed I wanted to say. I thought I had written, “I’m sorry, I can’t. Burl is just getting home.” But…what actually was sent was: “I’m sorry, I can’t. Burl is just getting good.”

  • Linnaea
  • 25 Jan, 2011
  • 7:04 pm
 

Sweet lady, thank you kindly for your lovely comments - it’s so good of you to visit! I adore your text message anecdote; if anything it teaches us about both the wonders and woes of modern technology. On one hand, it’s so convenient, yet slip-ups such as this (albeit amusing, in your case) are far too easy. You are lucky predicitive text wasn’t even naughtier. We live and learn, we live and learn…

  • Dana
  • 25 Jan, 2011
  • 7:10 pm
   

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